How to be a biker {or at least look like one}

HOW TO BE A BIKER or at least look & act like one.

So you want to be a biker? Or perhaps look & act like one, well it's not all that hard to do providing you can follow the do's and don'ts of bikerism. Just like almost any other culture, bikers have a sort of pecking order. Usally goes like this, long time riders, usally older guys that have put miles on, built their own rides, have some great biker stories, those guys tend to get respect. Now, just being a geezer with a Harley does'nt qualify you as a "biker" especially if you have fringes on any part of yourself or your Harley, thats a serious fashion infraction. Anytime I see some guy wearing the full leather pkg, {chaps, heavy black leather jacket with HUGE harley logo or wings, bandana, matching gloves} I know they just bought a Harley, and wants the world to know it. There's nothing wrong with being proud of your new, shiny, store bought "hell on 2 wheels" motorcycle, but guys that really ride & ride hard know that your a newbie, and thats never been a problem for me, BUT lets get things straight, just cause you've got a few bucks, and you always wanted a Harley Davidson does'nt make you special.In the last few years hundreds of thousands of new bikes have been bought, and a fair guess is a large percentage of first time harley owners are over 50. Enough said about the oldies, young men apparently think that getting a Harley bumps you up a notch in social standings, which is'nt the case. Just like any club, or job you must earn your stature, be it through skills as a builder or whatever.

What makes me such an expert {if there's such a thing} , Ive been riding a Harley since 1977, bought it new & striped it in the first month and transformed it into a cool chopper. Over the years I've built 20 plus bikes mostly from scratch, put the odd one in a show, rode hard, drank hard, shared company with patched riders, travelled the country on 2 wheels, and still build & ride a kick only chopper today. 99 percent of my friends are bikers or ride, I just can't pretend to care about stuff that really does'nt interest me, your yard, job or, pretty much anything that doesn't relate to my life involvement with motorcycles. {thats shallow, I know}

Getting back to the new bikers, here's 10 tips on how to look cool without trying, this won't work for everyone, cause some guys just can't act & look cool.

1 Don't over dress the part. Leathers are made for keeping warm, and protection in case of wipeouts, chaps are for keeping legs warm or dry, also used as prtection, not prancing around like a leather model, when its 80 degrees out.

2 Don't wear your shades indoor

3 Fringes is a definate no no.

4 Don't load your Harley up with a ton of chromed up crap.

5 Try not to overdue the sew on patches.

6 Try & listen more, talk less, especially about biker related matters, since you really don't know anything. Some guy thats been ridin for 10 or 20 years probably has great stories, & probably does'nt care to hear about new chromed hand grips.

7 BE YOURSELF, even though your a fresh outta the box biker, don't make up imaginary "Hells Angel" buddies, or crazy stunts you preformed, or the bottle of Jack you drank, then rode your bike 100 MPH all the way home. Not beliveable!!! sorry {maybe the Jack story is}

8 Less is more as far as looking like a biker, don't wear the leather uniform, ditch the little beenie helmet, lose the huge devil rings. Tring too hard makes you look like your trying too hard. Work clothes are kinda cool, AND you can just go right from work to your buddies Harley shop, hangout and have beers without going home. Or ride to your favorite watering hole, chicks dig hard working biker dudes, even old ones.

9 Be selective with your biker funtions, don't go to every little group ride, like say "the ride for new toilets at the rest stop" or "the ride for women that don't shave their pits" you get it, just cause you want to be seen riding in formation like "the bikers of old". I know it feels cool being in a long swath of menacing iron, but when the rides over & your standing in the Walmart, parking lot, with all the shiny new harleys, your simply a bunch of guys with a shiny new harleys.

10 Wearing Harley Davidson everything is lame, t-shirt once in awhile, thats ok, but the HD shirt, hat, belt, boots & ring says it all " wanna be"

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Good luck, MUDDY103